It was the night before we left to visit family for
Thanksgiving and I was furiously working to get all the cooking done that I had
volunteered for before we hit the road.
Everything was done except the pies.
I had tested the pie a few days before (and also ate said pie almost
entirely on my own) and it turned out perfectly.
But today was different.
The pie crust wouldn’t stick together, then it was too sticky. Back and forth I went-- water then flour then
water then flour. I slammed the dough
into the bowl and shouted my disapproval at this ridiculous mess of a pie I was
making. There may have also been
tears. My house was a mess, these pies
were a mess, my life was a mess. Through
the tears and my disbelief that I was THAT bad at pie making, I felt a hug
around my leg. As my sweet two year old
held my leg and patted me, all she kept repeating was, “I know, Mommy. I know.”
Those words are the reassuring words I offer when she is upset
at the world. When she sees me pick up
everything I desire at the store and toss it into the cart, but I don’t let her
keep that toy she grabbed off the shelf.
I know, Addie. I know. When Daddy is on a call and she can’t go into
his office. I know, Addie. I know.
When she trips and scrapes her knee.
I know, Addie. I know.
For a few days after my pie fit, Addie would gently remind
me in random places. In the car I’d hear
her say, “Mommy, I know you made apple pie.
I know.”
It made me smile that in my time of frustration she offered
the empathy I had been offering to her for two years. She understood that I was upset and knew the
only thing she could offer was her words as comfort. I try so hard to understand her world and how
it must look to her. I lose my cool
plenty, but I get down and look into her eyes and ask forgiveness. I want her to know that I am a listening and
understanding ear so that whenever she feels hurt she knows she can come to
me. I can’t fix all the injustices in
this 2 year old‘s world, but I can listen and offer my ear and tell her, “It’s
okay. I know, Addie. I know.”
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